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I thought Louis was playing another one of his practical jokes on me. But something just wasn't quite right. He came limping back into the commons, as if he were Quasi-Modo. Additionally, he looked as if he had been mauled by some creature! His usually meticulously slicked hair was tousled, his shirt was ripped open and there were bruises and dirt all over him. What the devil had happened?!?!
I asked Louis what had happened, and if he was okay. In a voice not sounding like his own, he muttered something to me about being "The Keymaster." The Keymaster? Like a teetotaler at a frat party? I tried to laugh it off. "What are you talking about?" I asked. "I am Vinz Clortho, Keymaster of Gozer! Volguus Zildrohar...Lord of the Sebouillia..." he muttered. What the...? He was starting to frighten some of my friends with his antics.
That was when he started sniffing some of the condiments in the Plaza.
Uh, okay. I was pretty scared at this point myself.
When Louis started sniffing the wicker, I knew something had gone horribly horribly wrong! I was going to call Campus Safety, but instead I called my friend Dr. Egon Spengler, seen in the background above. Below is an image of the respected Dr. Spengler.
Egon decided to take Louis into his office to perform some "tests."
When Egon and Louis came back, Egon informed us that he had given Louis 300 CC's of thorazine. We finally got Louis to sit down and relax. He looked like the floor of a taxi cab at this point. And I truly was beginning to believe that he was possessed. Check out those red eyes!
We tried talking to him about what had happened, but he just kept muttering something about "Gozer the Gozerian...The Traveler, The Destructor."
Egon said "this looks extraordinarily bad. We should get him help immediately." We decided to take Louis back to the dorm and call the psychiatric ward. I said "you are so kind to take care of that man. You know, you're a real humanitarian." Egon replied "I don't think he's human."
Louis confirmed this diagnosis when he stopped to smell the garbage on the way back to the dorm.
Well, as we neared Fairmont Hall, Louis wigged out and yelled at us: "wait for the sign, that's when all prisoners will be released! YOU WILL PERISH IN FLAME!!!" Then he took off howling into the night. I was at a loss for words. My old friend had turned into a psycho right before my eyes. Unfortunately, this wasn't the last incident I would have with Louis and his mysterious "Keymaster" alter ego...